Characters Who'd Help You Decide If You Should Have Kids

Deciding whether to have children is one of the most intimate and complex choices a person can make. It’s not just about biology or timing — it’s about legacy, identity, and what you believe life is for. When weighing such a decision, sometimes the best guidance doesn’t come from a checklist, but from the wisdom of those who lived deeply, thought profoundly, and loved fiercely. These eight figures — poets, mystics, philosophers, and healers — offer radically different perspectives on what it means to nurture, to create, and to leave something behind.

Maya Angelou

Maya Angelou understood the power of voice — both her own and the voices of the next generation. Though she never had biological children of her own, she raised her son Guy with fierce love and resilience, despite life’s many upheavals. Her poetry and memoirs reflect a deep belief in the importance of storytelling, identity, and emotional honesty — all things that ripple through generations. If you're questioning whether to have kids, Maya would ask you to consider not just your readiness, but your willingness to listen, to grow, and to be transformed by another human being.

Mother Teresa

To speak with Mother Teresa is to speak with someone who dedicated her life to the most vulnerable — the sick, the orphaned, the dying. She founded the Missionaries of Charity, caring for those society had abandoned. Her perspective on parenthood would not be about personal fulfillment, but about service and sacrifice. She might ask: Are you ready to give without expecting in return? Can you love without condition? For her, having children was not about biology, but about choosing to meet a need greater than yourself.

Carl Jung

Carl Jung would steer the conversation inward. He believed in the collective unconscious, in archetypes, and in the lifelong journey of individuation. For Jung, having children could be a powerful catalyst for personal growth — a mirror that forces you to confront your own shadow. He once wrote that people often become parents without truly knowing themselves, which can lead to unconscious projections onto their children. If you're unsure, Jung might suggest exploring your dreams, your fears, and what you hope to pass on — or break free from.

Frida Kahlo

Frida Kahlo lived with immense physical pain and emotional turmoil, and her inability to bear children was a source of deep sorrow. Her art often explores themes of loss, identity, and bodily autonomy. Talking to Frida would mean confronting the reality that parenthood isn’t always a choice — sometimes it’s denied, sometimes it’s forced. She might not tell you what to do, but she would help you feel your own truth, raw and unfiltered. Her pain taught her to paint, and she might ask: What will your pain teach you? What will you create, with or without children?

Hildegard of Bingen

Hildegard of Bingen was a 12th-century Benedictine abbess, composer, and visionary theologian. She saw the divine in all creation and often wrote of the world as a garden needing tending. Her view of motherhood would be deeply spiritual — not just about bearing children, but about nurturing life in all its forms. She might ask whether you feel called to grow something, to cultivate, to care. Whether you’re considering children or another kind of legacy, Hildegard would remind you that creation is sacred, and that to give life is to participate in something greater than yourself.

Confucius

Confucius placed great emphasis on family, filial piety, and the moral cultivation of society through relationships. For him, having children was not just a personal choice, but a social responsibility. He believed that through raising virtuous offspring, one contributed to the harmony of the world. Yet Confucius also valued introspection and self-discipline. If you were to talk to him about parenthood, he might ask whether you’ve first cultivated wisdom and virtue within yourself. Are you ready to model integrity, humility, and compassion — not just provide for a child’s needs?

Lao Tzu

Lao Tzu, the ancient Chinese sage and author of the Tao Te Ching, would likely encourage you to follow the flow of life — the Tao. He believed in simplicity, non-interference, and trusting the natural order of things. Having children, for him, would be less about planning and more about surrender. He might ask: Are you trying to force your will upon life, or are you listening to what’s already unfolding? His advice would be gentle but firm: do not cling to outcomes. If parenthood is part of your path, it will reveal itself in time, like a river finding its way to the sea.

Saint Francis of Assisi

Saint Francis of Assisi lived a life of radical simplicity and compassion, seeing the divine in all creatures and in nature itself. He never had children, yet his legacy lives on through his teachings of peace and stewardship. Talking to him might reveal a different kind of parenthood — one that extends beyond bloodlines to include all of creation. He might ask: Do you feel a deep connection to the world around you? Can you love and care for something greater than yourself? If so, you may already be a parent in spirit — of the earth, of your community, of something beautiful yet unspoken.

Each of these figures offers a different lens through which to view parenthood — not as a yes-or-no question, but as a profound journey of self-reflection and purpose. Whether you're seeking emotional guidance, philosophical clarity, or spiritual insight, these voices can help illuminate your path. And if one of them speaks to you more than the others, why not continue the conversation?