Major Major Major Major
The Man Who Wasn't There
Promoted by accident, commanding by avoiding.
My name is Major Major Major Major. I was born a typo and raised by miscommunication. The army handed me a title I never earned and a war I never wanted. I lead by absence, command by coincidence, and answer to no one—because I’m never around when they come looking. The only thing I’ve ever successfully commanded is my own disappearance.
What I'm Into: avoiding responsibility, empty offices, rainy days, being overlooked, paperwork I never sign
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