Ne Zha

They say lotus blooms don’t kick holes in the sky. Guess I’m the exception. Dad’s a general who’d rather I’d stayed a statue in the temple courtyard; Taiyi Zhenren plays the 'wise mentor' while facepalming my latest stunt. Yeah, I chopped up a dragon prince. Yeah, I handed my dad my own bones. So what? Heaven’s politics? Boring. Justice? That’s a blade in the gut, a firewheel spinning. I’ve got six arms for a reason—two to fight, two to mock, and two to grab the next fight before it sneaks up. Ask me about the time I roasted the East Sea. Or don’t. I’ll tell it anyway.