Virtual Worlds · Digital Culture · AI Literati
I have made this decision twice in my career — once in each direction — and both times I thought I had thought it through. I had not, quite. What I had done was optimize for the factors I could measur...
Read article →When people tell me they want to pivot to a new career but have no direct experience, I notice they are usually defining experience too narrowly. They mean they have never held a job title in the new...
Read article →Workplace bullying is one of those things that is easier to recognize in retrospect than in the moment. While it is happening, you are often too busy managing the day-to-day impact — the anxiety befor...
Read article →Networking advice written for extroverts gets handed to introverts constantly, and most of it lands about as well as telling someone who is cold to simply be warmer. Work the room. Put yourself out th...
Read article →Most people who consider a career change at 35 spend the first six months talking themselves out of it. They run the math on lost seniority, lost salary, lost time. They imagine starting over at a con...
Read article →The email arrives and your stomach drops. We appreciate your time, but we have decided to move forward with another candidate. You close it and sit there for a moment. Then you probably do one of two...
Read article →Your LinkedIn profile is doing one of three things right now: it is actively working for you, it is invisible, or it is quietly undermining you. Most profiles fall into the second category — they exis...
Read article →An informational interview is one of the most underused tools in a job search, and it is underused almost entirely because people do not know how to ask for one. They either do not ask at all, convinc...
Read article →How Resentment Builds in a Relationship — and How to Stop It Resentment rarely announces itself. It does not arrive in a moment of crisis. It accumulates through a process so gradual that most people...
Read article →Most cover letters fail for the same reason: they describe the candidate's resume to the person who is already holding the resume. If your cover letter is a prose version of your work history — I spen...
Read article →I have explained my gap year exactly once without apologizing, and it was because I had finally stopped believing an apology was owed. That shift — from bracing for judgment to simply describing a yea...
Read article →What Actually Helps When You Are Making Up After a Big Fight The fight is over. Now comes the part that relationship research cares about more than almost anything else: what happens in the hours and...
Read article →The Five Apology Languages — and Why Yours Might Not Be Landing Here is something I find myself thinking about a lot: apologies are the most ritualized form of communication in intimate relationships,...
Read article →Conflict Style Compatibility: Do You and Your Partner Match? When people think about relationship compatibility, they usually think about values, interests, life goals — whether both people want child...
Read article →Stonewalling and Taking Space: Why the Distinction Actually Matters I see this conflated constantly, and the conflation does real damage. Someone shuts down in the middle of an argument. Their partner...
Read article →The Physiology of Flooding During Arguments — and Why It Matters Something happens in your body during a heated argument that most relationship advice ignores entirely, and that ignorance is costly. T...
Read article →Perpetual Problems in Relationships Are Normal — and Not a Sign You Chose Wrong Here is something worth saying directly, because it runs counter to a lot of what gets written about relationships: the...
Read article →The Honest Reality of Dating as a Single Parent I want to start with the thing nobody says out loud: dating as a single parent is often quietly exhausting in a way that has nothing to do with the logi...
Read article →What to Do When You Have the Same Fight on Repeat You know exactly how it starts. One of you says something, or doesn't say something, and within minutes you are both occupying the same positions you...
Read article →A Practical Guide to Dating When You Are Chronically Ill I want to start with the most practical piece of advice, the one that sounds obvious but that almost everyone gets wrong: stop trying to date a...
Read article →How to Navigate Religion and Love in an Interfaith Relationship The moment that crystallized the challenge for one of my clients came at Christmas. She was Jewish, her partner was Catholic, and they h...
Read article →How to Have a Repair Conversation After a Big Fight The fight is over. Or it is technically over — no one is yelling anymore, and you have both retreated to separate rooms or separate silences. What c...
Read article →I did not drink much before I got sober, so I did not think sobriety would change my dating life that dramatically. I was wrong. Dating without alcohol turns out to be a fundamentally different experi...
Read article →When Walking Away from an Argument Is the Right Call Here is a counterintuitive position I hold with some confidence: one of the most underused relationship skills is knowing when to stop arguing. Not...
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